Sunday, June 14, 2009

"My new path"


I have been fielding a lot of questions about "my new path" in life. The truth is I want to sit down with each and every friend I have and have coffee and explain to them what has been going on in my life. But I know that is not possible. I have been trying to figure out how I am going to tell everyone that I am no longer a school teacher anymore. I am still a teacher, just with COMPLETELY different students. :)


I have taken a position with Houndstooth Clothing Company as their new Regional Manager and Custom Sales Representative. What does this mean and how in the world did this happen, you ask? Well I will share.


Two and half years ago I graduated from UCA with my degree in Family and Consumer Science Education! Yes! I was going to teach and change the world! I graduated in the middle of the year and was sure that I was going to be substituting for the rest of the year until I found a full time position. Over Christmas break (for me, but not for most jr. high/high schools) I searched on the internet and found a job in PCSSD at Fuller Middle School. In big letters it said (FACS-TEMPORARY). I could not believe my eyes. A FACS position. Open right now? I knew I had to call. Talked to a few different people and just like that I had an interview! OMG. Are you serious? I found out exactly what I was going to wear, said some prayers, and showed up. The interview was odd. Not exactly what I expected. But I seemed to breeze right through it. There were no "hard" questions, but there were some good ones. When I was about to leave one of the administrators said, "Well this is going to be a very hard decision for us, but...." and the other administrator said, "What are you talking about....no it's not!" and laughed. She smiled and said, "We weren't expecting you. You are a breath of fresh air." I thanked them and left. They told me they would call either way by the end of the week. I got in the car and called my momma. I remember what she said when I told her what they said at the end. She said, "OUT-STANDING!" And that still makes me smile.



I didn't really understand what the situation was at the school but quickly found out. The principal called me that Sunday and offered me the position. I was ecstatic! "Yes. Yes. Of course. When will I start?" I told him about my friend Jessica's wedding that I was in at the beginning of January, but it didn't matter because that was there Christmas beak anyways. He told me that January 8th would be my first day. They fired the other teacher near the last day before the break.


Let's keep in mind that I am certified to teach 7th through 12th grade. High School was my passion, but hey Middle School was who was hiring and I was all about a "real" job. And boy that's what I got. Lucky for you I will NOT recap all 2 1/2 years (I so should've blogged all that time.) All I can really say is that my eyes were opened to what some public schools can really be like. It was very, very sad. And most days would make me extremely mad. I had good days, but I also had a lot of frustrating days as well. At the end of most days I felt like I didn't get much accomplished. I argued. With 13 and 14 years olds. If I said no, they tried to find 11 different ways to ask the same question. All I could think about what how much kids have changed since I was their age. Most had cell phones. Some had nose rings, tongue rings, lip rings. Cleavage. We had a uniform policy, but it took me a week and an announcement over the loud speaker to discover this. Are you serious? A uniform? The kids are in whatever they want. Whether they got away with it or not depended on the teacher, the administrator, and even the day. I "argued" about everything from tardies, to absences (skipping), attitudes, apathy, prejudice, stereotypes, uniforms, cheating, iPods, no materials, no book, cussing, gangs, fights (in and out of my room), food, yelling, slapping, gossip, drugs, and the list goes on and on. Most of you will say, "Duh, you taught middle school." Although in some ways I could agree, in most ways I couldn't because I could see what went on behind closed doors. The kids didn't have to do what I say because in all reality it didn't matter. Nothing was going to happen to them. Nothing was going to change them. Believe me, I talked until I was blue in the face. I loved these kids, I cared about them. But they barely cared about themselves. And some ONLY cared about themselves. I got very discouraged because in my heart I knew there was nothing I could do to change the attitudes and the lives of most of these kids.

I grew bitter. Annoyed. Irritated. Angry. Mean. Sad. Lonely. Careless. I started showing up when the first bell rang and leaving as soon as the last bell rang. I left before the buses. I planned my days off of school around the classes I couldn't stand the most. It was pathetic. I griped and complained non-stop. To teachers, to Chris, to Anna. Pretty much to anyone that would listen. "I can't believe they did that!" "I can't believe they got away with that" "Why would she do that to me?" "I don't want to go to school tomorrow." "I wish this day would hurry up and end." I was not myself and I knew it. I was tired of Monday looming over my head on Sunday. I was in a funk. Did not want the weekend to end (and not in a normal/healthy way). I finally decided (with MUCH thought, talk, and prayer) that I wasn't going to do it anymore. I was NOT going to be THAT teacher that just sat around and hid out (trust me, they are out there) and got my paycheck. They did as little as possible to get by and pretty much just babysat all day. Teaching is a stable job, but if that was "stable", I didn't want any part of it. I was tired of being talked to like dirt by students. Other teachers would take advantage of me. I knew more than I ever needed to know about staff. And I just started feeling burdened by everything and everyone and would avoid conflict at any cost. I just became the friend that listened. And I had way too much going on in this little head. I had many talks with my husband and needed him to know that my happiness was going to have to come first at some point. Can I stay and teach and try to make the most of it even though ALMOST everything is out of my control??? Yes. Of course. But do I HAVE to? Life is too short for this. Hubby gave in and allowed me to go after another option that crept it's way back into my life.........

Back in October we went in to Houndstooth to buy Chris a couple of shirts. I had not had a new one in at least a year or so. This is the company that I worked with for 5 years prior to my teaching career. The service was SO bad that I felt like I owed it to the owner to call him and at least let him know what was going on. A few weeks later I was back part-time being a "Team Leader Consultant". Who would've thought? The owner simply wanted me to work a few hours a week (or however many I chose) helping the managers run their stores better. He wanted me to get it back to "how it used to be." Just at McCain and Park Plaza. I started working about ten hours a week. After school. On the weekends. After church. Whenever I could. I simply loved it and missed it. I took it upon myself to not only work with the leaders, but with the regular employees as well. Had to work from the bottom up. The workers would start saying, "When are you going to work on my shift, you always work with her?" Or they would call me and vent or be excited over how much they sold that day. They would call me and ask me to come help. They would call and apologize for "bugging" me. But little did they know, they weren't bugging me. They were making me feel needed. Appreciated. Valued.

One thing lead to another and my boss and friend Ashley was fighting for me to belong to their business again. They had been without a Regional for some time and had gotten comfortable without another salary to pay out. However, she felt as though I was an asset to the company. She knew that you had to hire for WHO was right, even though sometimes it may not always be the right time. We contemplated, and talked, and talked, and prayed, and negotiated,and talked, and prayed some more. The door was open. We just had to make the decision.

What I love the most is that I am still and will always be a teacher. When Chris and I move in 3 years for his residency, I will try being a SCHOOL teacher again. Maybe high school. Maybe elementary. All I have really learned is that it's about the RELATIONSHIPS. When I become a school teacher again, I hope to know these kids on a different level. A level that they care about what I think. That is what I have been missing. At this point, the world is at my fingertips. For now, I get to teach those 16 and up. ;) For a company I know, love, and trust. And most of all enjoy. I get to travel the state and help out the stores in Fort Smith, Jonesboro, Little Rock, North Little Rock, and Hot Springs. I will travel to Fayetteville for meetings and updates and Razorback games. My goal is to be a help to these people. Not to criticize or point my finger. Just to show up and say, "What can I do?" "What do you need?" "What's been bothering you?" "How can we fix this?" "Great job!" I don't want them to fear my visit, but I do want them to anticipate it. You know.....because they care.

I start the custom sales part of my new job TOMORROW and the Regional part at the end of July. Just in the nick of time.

So, I would like to say that all of my posts will not be this long (I hope), but I have had so many people interested in what's going on in my life. Leaving the "teaching" profession is kind of a big deal. I could think of no better reason than that to start my new blog.

And I also want to add that I do have some friendships that I took with me from Fuller. People that I love and appreciate. For listening to me, for caring, and for giving me their honest opinion even though they didn't want me to leave. I had one email to let me know that even though I may not have felt purposed there, she felt as though my purpose was there for her and other teachers there. I had changed them. That meant a lot.


God is good. All the time. And for that I am grateful.